Moving past the mat, how about this life-balance magic trick everyone is on about? I am going to let you in on my personal mindset right now…and its not what your instagram feed is probably yelling at you. Early motherhood is not a balanced life. Ya, I said it.
It’s not going to be, it’s not supposed to be, and it’s ok for it to be that way. I am adopting a mindset of a bigger picture. Early motherhood is a sliver of time that you have in your life. A sliver of time when little ones are fully dependent on you and where we have the honour to give them all they need. I am not suggesting to give up yourself, far from it. However I am suggesting, to go easy on yourself when you get to the end of the day and you wonder “what in the world was accomplished today?”.
There is so much pressure put on the modern day mama, to be some societal defined
superwoman. This pressure gives way for mamas to believe we have to make time in each day to raise happy healthy little children with homemade food, arts and crafts and puppet shows + run a company + get fit, + be a sexy partner + be a supportive friend who is always available for a girls night + make time for self-care. I see so many women, including myself, fall victim to this mindset. Can we just stop with the societal superwoman pressure, and give way to mamas being allowed to mother in their own uniquely perfect, present ways?
What if we step back for a moment and try on the mindset that not every day and every month or even every year have to be in perfect balance and adjust the vision to having a complete lifetime in balance?
There are times in life that certain projects and people (hello cute snuggly babies) are going to be all consuming, and I am here for that. Can you remember a time pre-motherhood, maybe at a job, where you had a deadline that you dedicated most of your waking moments to? Or how about a time you had an athletic goal, like participating in a marathon or a triathlon. You would have trained for 8 hours on some days…if not more! That was not balanced…and that was OK. You got that time back in recovery, in days in lieu and on your epic holidays.
My main message is that you can give yourself permission to fully embrace these early years of motherhood where our small children need us. They need all the cuddles, all the milk, all the mother loving goodness that we can offer them. This chapter of life is just that, a chapter. Remember the bigger picture. We will get the time back later when our children don’t depend on us for so much. We will return to regular girls nights, full-time jobs and wardrobes with more than athleisure wear.
Please know that I also 100% support and advocate for mamas making time for themselves everyday. To stay mentally healthy, we need to hold onto our identity by staying in connection with our jobs, or our friends, or our fitness routines or our self care rituals. But each of these connection points don’t have to be met each day or each week, and it doesn’t have to happen in the same way that we once did pre-early motherhood. Self care can look like a quiet cup of tea during nap time or solo shower where you get to wash your hair AND shave your legs in one go. An exercise might be 20 minutes, and time spent on work might be much more scheduled and no longer come home with you.
What I do hope to impart by sharing my personal mindset on a perfectly, imbalanced
motherhood, is that mamas don’t have to take time away from those precious moments, so they can make sure to meet some imaginary daily quota of balance. I want to ensure I am living in the present, because before I know it my children will be grown. There will come a time when they won’t need me to scratch their back until they fall asleep or for me to hold them and reassure them that they are safe and they are loved. I will get all that time back, hopefully in the form of a luxury yoga retreat that includes a daily cocktail hour, but today I am living in the unbalanced early motherhood years…and I’m here for that.
The Updog Yoga Mamas intention is to provide a way for mamas to bring yoga into their daily routine without complication. To empower mamas to acknowledge their energy and their families energy each day, and then select the best practice for that day. Whether it be a 10 minute grounding meditation to balance out the emotional rollercoaster of motherhood, a 30 minute gentle yin to restore the body after a sleepless night or a 45 minute power flow to energise the body and mind - mamas now have the choice to cater their daily practice to suit their needs. Join now >